newly married couple
Were you aware that your husband – and most men – see romance across various lenses compared to most women? To prove this, divide men and women into separate groups and ask them to answer the same question the next time you study in Bible or Sunday school: “What is a romantic thing you want to make for your spouse?”
We can guarantee that men focus on physical intimacy if they are honest: “Sexy faulty dress up…” “There are no clothes at the front door.” But women say things such as: “Take me to a candlelit romantic restaurant,” “There’s time to talk to me,” “Sit together and cuddle in front of a fire.” Men generally have a vision and touch motivation, whereas women usually want a relationship with romance.
Men vs Women
Meeting the romantic needs of your husband means trying to realize that they are probably different from yours. It also means that you are sometimes willing to sacrifice your husband’s needs. We have learned the difficulty of not mixing egotism and romance well.
We want to help you to grow into a husband’s still more significant student. This article cannot teach you all you need to know; you have to sift through the real thing. But here are four areas to begin as you deepen your husband’s understanding.
Mutual Respect in Romance
His wife must respect one of the most profound needs of a man. Notice that it’s one of the most profound needs we said. Others exist, but his views are affected by your respect — or lack thereof. Your husband’s respect includes listening to him, not just hearing the words from his mouth, but taking what he says seriously. If Barbara listened to me (Dennis), she didn’t show me respect if I expressed a desire that I think is important to the family or children but never did what I said. It doesn’t matter why she ignored what I told her; she always hits my stomach. It doesn’t matter. If we were to do this often, our relationship and bedroom would have definite consequences, losing the romance.
Your husband’s other way of honoring him for what he does to meet the families’ needs. It’s like feeding him his favorite food to show a man’s gratitude. It’s a celebration for your heart and soul. Even if he does a poor job in some areas, something should be done well – to give the family a job, keep the house clean, or possibly bring devotion to the family.
I’m never going to forget to meet a student’s young wife. After I spoke at a class for women, she came up to me about how to communicate love to her husband.
“The other night of the youth group, we drove home,” she said (her husband was a youth pastor). “I turned to him and said, ‘Honey, what really would encourage you to be a man of God?’ There was a time of silence, and he said, “Well, I’d like to find you at home without clothing one evening if I come home from school.”
The woman rattled again, asking, “Do you think he meant that?”
“I do not know,” I said. I did not. “Perhaps you should try it!”